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Is it that when a woman falls in love with a man, she falls into endless fantasy? At least that was true for Shang Zhitao. In her fantasies, Luan Nian liked her, just a little. Even if that fondness left no trace, she preferred to believe it anyway. Her work didn't end particularly late that Friday, but she lingered at her desk, unwilling to leave. Maybe, like before, if she went out late enough, Luan Nian would take pity on her and give her a ride. In her mind she rehearsed countless versions of what she would say once she got into his car, or maybe she wouldn't say anything at all. They had enough understanding between them that Luan Nian would just take her home. But Luan Nian left. He walked out of the office without so much as a glance in her direction. Something clawed at Shang Zhitao's heart, a faint itch of pain she could bear, but the feeling was never a pleasant one. She sat a while longer before finally shouldering her bag and heading out, catching the last bu...

The last time Zhitao had danced was freshman year, when her school club roped her into an event she never wanted to join. After she stepped on a few classmates' feet, no one asked her to dance again. Not dancing was fine, but she still had to show up for something, didn't she? Later, while she was doing laundry in the dorm's washroom, some club members passed by and heard her humming. That was how everyone found out Zhitao could actually sing, something she hadn't even known about herself. After that she was dragged onstage to sing once or twice. Zhitao hated performing in front of people. She still remembered how, as a child, whenever family gathered for the holidays, the kids were always made to perform something. She had no particular talent, so she used to bring her brush, ink, and paper along, and when her turn came she'd stand up and announce, "I'll write some calligraphy for grandpa, grandma, aunts, and uncles!" Writing took forever, and by the...

Alex handed the small project to Shang Zhitao. None of the other people in the department wanted to take on something so minor, since it was hard to make it look good on paper. But Zhitao was willing. Whatever else it was, it was her first time acting as project manager. She felt a flicker of excitement mixed with nerves. After she picked up the initial project materials, she sat at her desk and didn't move for a long while. The annual industry survey was one of the company's required projects every year, used to support different departments in shaping ad strategy for clients across various industries. Small as it was, the project was far from simple. It called for surveying the needs of related departments, analyzing past years' input and output, selecting a research firm, setting project milestones. Every piece had to be in place. She had trailed behind Lumi on a handful of projects before and read up on the subject herself, but now it felt like all that studying had l...

Shang Zhitao stood at the door and waited a while before Luan Nian came out with a towel wrapped around his waist, water dripping from his hair, looking flawless. She had no time to admire it. She pointed toward his bedroom. "Luke, there's a bathroom in there too. You could shower in that one." What are you fighting me for, she thought. I'm going to be late for work. Shang Zhitao was never late, and she genuinely worried she would be this time. She was still trying to figure out how she would leave later. Luan Nian ignored her and walked into the closet to change. People in creative work tended to have exacting standards for how they dressed. Luan Nian's clothes were always well tailored, simple and refined. He didn't dress the way other creatives did, all flash and personality. His clothes looked understated. But understated clothes looked different on him. By the time he finished changing, Shang Zhitao had washed up and looked refreshed. She wasn't we...

This wasn't what Luan Nian expected. He had turned Shang Zhitao down, meaning to end things with her for good. But the moment his fingertips brushed her hot, soft earlobe, he wanted something else entirely. Something urgent, something with the force to break her apart, something that wanted to crush her. Shang Zhitao had told herself just yesterday that she would never sleep with Luan Nian again. Today, hearing him invite her back to his place, she froze, staring at him, saying nothing at all. Luan Nian's fingers moved against her earlobe. "I've decided your proposal isn't such a bad idea," he said. "What?" "Being regular partners." He reminded her, then started the engine and said nothing more. He drove faster than usual, fast enough that Shang Zhitao felt they wouldn't even need foreplay. Even the strange silence in the car was enough to stir her. She couldn't explain what was happening to her. The desire rising in her chest...

She caught this year's red leaves just before autumn ended. They looked nothing like the ones back in Nanjing, carrying instead the sweeping grandeur of mountains and rivers. Whatever disappointment she'd been carrying simply dissolved. Coming down from the mountain, the group leader suggested dinner at Guijie. Guijie wasn't actually far from Shang Zhitao's office, though she'd never been. She signed up for the group dinner along with Sun Yu. Beijing was such an open city. None of them really knew each other, having only traded a few glances up on the mountain, but the moment they sat down at the same table, everyone turned instantly familiar. Sun Yu loved a lively crowd and drank with the men. A whole table of strangers chatting about everything under the sun turned out to be a novel experience in itself. Shang Zhitao only had eyes for the crawfish in front of her. Back when she was studying in Nanjing, crawfish had been her favorite, cheaper there, shipped in ...