Chapter 37: He Can't Return, So He Bleeds for Her Every Night

Many things didn't need to be said—they were already clear enough.

She looked at Xie Changji, waiting for him to back down or hesitate.

But he stepped forward directly.

"You..."

Hua Xiangwan hadn't finished speaking when he suddenly reached out through the falling snow and pulled her into his arms.

He was half a head taller than her. One hand cradled the back of her head, the other circled her waist, his robes hanging down to completely envelop her.

Warmth washed over her. She stood there, stunned.

Her nose pressed against his shoulder, and she could clearly smell the cool pine fragrance emanating from him. Her gaze drifted over his shoulder to the white snow beyond—a stark contrast to the warmth he offered.

"Not every moment has meaning, but right now, I'm here." His voice whispered in her ear. "So there's no need to smile."

Hearing this, Hua Xiangwan's eyes widened slightly. Only then did she realize the true meaning of everything he'd just said.

He had eyes that saw through the world.

He saw her joy and anger, her love and hate.

So he also saw the deep, rotten wound in her heart, hidden beneath her ever-present smile as she'd listened to Yu Sheng recount that past.

He wasn't expressing an effort to move forward. He was simply trying to soothe her emotions.

"Wanwan." His cool voice held a unique gentleness, a tenderness rarely heard in ordinary people. His tone was so understated it nearly drowned out all emotion. "It's all in the past. Move on."

Hearing this, for some reason, the turmoil Yu Sheng's words had stirred within her instantly subsided.

The memories and pain they'd awakened seemed to be gently soothed and flowed away, as if touched by a tender hand.

She stood somewhat bewildered in his arms. After a long while, she finally smiled. "You... you're really strange."

As she spoke, she reached to pull Xie Changji's hands away. Just as she was about to say something, she felt a powerful aura pressing down from above.

The ground trembled. Hua Xiangwan abruptly turned around. Xie Changji grabbed her hand and led her into the air.

The ground where they'd stood collapsed with a deafening roar. Hua Xiangwan looked up to see a gigantic face appear in the sky, seemingly shrouded in clouds, screaming madly above. "Hua Xiangwan, where is my son?!"

"Palace Master Wen?"

Hua Xiangwan heard the voice, looked up, and showed a shocked expression.

After a moment, she seemed to realize who it was and said urgently, "Palace Master Wen, you've come? Please save Shaoqing! He just sent me a message saying Ming Huo wanted to kill him, and then he disappeared!"

"Nonsense!"

Wen Rong cursed from above. Hua Xiangwan hurriedly took out a communication jade talisman. She hesitated, glanced at Xie Changji beside her, then handed it forward, gritting her teeth. "This is what Shaoqing left me. The contents should not be known to others. Please listen to the message privately, Palace Master Wen."

"Give it to me!"

Upon hearing Wen Rong's words, tremendous force suddenly came from the sky. The jade talisman flew upward, passed through the clouds, and disappeared.

Beyond the clouds lay the inner palace of Qingle Palace. Wen Rong, having obtained the jade token, wiped it with her hand and heard the conversation between Wen Shaoqing and Ming Huo.

"My mother lit my life lamp. If you kill me, my mother will surely kill you."

"I'll kill you?" Ming Huo's laughter came through the communication talisman. "In Goddess Mountain, you coveted the wife of a Tribulation Transcending stage expert. Who do you think killed you? Why should I kill you? Drowning is your destiny."

"Awan, save me! Ming Huo wants to kill me!"

Wen Shaoqing's voice abruptly stopped. Wen Rong gripped the communication jade token tightly, her eyes red, gritting her teeth in silence.

Ming Huo... that bastard Ming Huo! The Yin Yang Sect had always been under Qingle Palace's jurisdiction, yet he was promoted by Qin Yunyi. She'd long known Ming Huo's heart wasn't in Qingle, but considering Wen Shaoqing and Qin Yunyi's marriage, she hadn't imposed restrictions.

She never expected him to have such audacity.

Hua Xiangwan knew the communication talisman had greatly impacted Wen Rong. She feigned anxiety and waited. After a long while, Wen Rong finally spoke again. "Why did he communicate with you?"

"I gave him a communication talisman." Hua Xiangwan hesitated, glancing at Xie Changji beside her. "He crushed the communication talisman, and I knew something had happened to him. Palace Master Wen, how is he now?"

She raised her head, her tone full of restrained urgency. "I've been searching for him for a long time but haven't found him. Now Ming Huo is gone too. He..."

"He's dead!"

Wen Rong exclaimed excitedly. "His soul lamp has gone out. He died from drowning!"

Hearing this, Hua Xiangwan's eyes widened instantly. Her legs went weak and she nearly collapsed. Xie Changji reacted quickly, catching her, unable to help glancing at her again.

Tears welled up in Hua Xiangwan's eyes. She trembled as she spoke. "He... how could he..."

"Explain yourself." Wen Rong reached out from the clouds, grabbing at Hua Xiangwan aggressively. "How did he die? You..."

"Get out!"

Before Wen Rong could get close, Xie Changji shouted sharply. His sword intent spread out, instantly forming a sword array in front of him, blocking the giant hand between himself and Hua Xiangwan.

He looked up coldly at the giant face in the sky. "Don't touch her."

"No..." Hua Xiangwan seemed to only then realize what Xie Changji was doing. She hugged him tightly, as if desperately trying to stop him, and cried out, "Xie Changji, don't do this to Palace Master Wen! Take it out on me! That's Shaoqing's mother—don't! Don't hurt her!"

Xie Changji froze, stopped by Hua Xiangwan. She looked up at Wen Rong. "Palace Master Wen! Go quickly! Don't worry about me!"

Even experiencing the pain of losing her son, seeing Hua Xiangwan who was completely confused, Wen Rong still choked up.

Xie Changji stared coldly at her. Hua Xiangwan seemed to desperately try to stop him, shaking her head and shouting, "Palace Master Wen, go quickly!"

Wen Rong hesitated for a moment, knowing Xie Changji wouldn't let her question Hua Xiangwan alone. She simply said, "You'd better explain yourself!"

After that, she withdrew her magic and disappeared into the air.

Once the surroundings quieted, Xie Changji calmly turned around, looking at Hua Xiangwan, who was still clinging to him with eyes closed, putting on an act. He pursed his lips.

"Palace Master Wen!!"

"She's gone."

Xie Changji couldn't help but remind her. Hua Xiangwan paused, raised her tear-filled eyes, looked to the side, and after confirming Wen Rong was gone, breathed a sigh of relief. She straightened up and wiped her face. "You scared me to death."

Xie Changji didn't speak. He looked at her calmly.

Hua Xiangwan noticed his gaze and looked up. "What are you looking at?"

Xie Changji hesitated for a moment, then reached out and carefully touched her eyes.

Real moisture welled under his fingertips. He frowned slightly. "It's real."

"Of course." Hua Xiangwan was annoyed by his lack of knowledge. She carefully hid the Blood Token and Azure Sea Pearl, then turned and walked away. "You think I've lived for two hundred years by fighting and killing?"

Xie Changji silently stepped forward, took her hand, and channeled his spiritual energy into her body. Hua Xiangwan glanced at him and smiled. "Without a sword, I have to use other methods. You don't think I'm being despicable, do you?"

Xie Changji shook his head, then thought for a moment. "What about Xunqing?"

Xunqing was her natal sword.

Hua Xiangwan paused, somewhat puzzled. "Why are you asking this?"

"It's inconvenient to use the Heart-Questioning Sword." Xie Changji explained. After all, the Heart-Questioning Sword guarded the realm of life and death—rarely drawn casually.

Hua Xiangwan understood immediately. He'd formed a blood pact with her back then. Although she couldn't use the Heart-Questioning Sword now, he was still recognized by it.

The Heart-Questioning Sword was essentially his other natal sword, which made her somewhat dissatisfied. She grumbled, "You've taken all the advantages."

Xie Changji didn't speak. Hua Xiangwan sighed. "Alright, I've put it somewhere. I'll go get it for you another day when it's on my way."

"Okay."

The two talked as they walked down the mountain.

The inexplicable emotions from before vanished in the silence, disappearing without trace.

Hua Xiangwan deliberately didn't mention it, and Xie Changji remained silent as well.

After walking for a while, when they reached the foot of the mountain, they saw people kneeling on the ground, wailing and kowtowing.

They'd all returned to their original appearances, kneeling and kowtowing toward Goddess Mountain.

Hua Xiangwan glanced back. Goddess Mountain was almost completely collapsed. She couldn't help but shake her head. "The Goddess is gone. How pitiful."

"There's still the Dao Sect." Xie Changji reminded her. Yun Sheng Town was under the Dao Sect's jurisdiction. Whether or not Goddess Mountain protected them, the Dao Sect wouldn't abandon them.

Hua Xiangwan thought for a moment and nodded. "That's true."

The two came down from the mountain and casually found an inn.

While Xie Changji was making the bed, Hua Xiangwan briefly explained the situation to the kingfisher and Yu Gu. Yu Gu pondered for a moment, then said softly, "Now that Ming Huo's whereabouts are unknown, I'll first release the message of the Blood Order to him. Ming Huo is the sect leader of the Yin Yang Sect. Wen Rong will definitely go to the Yin Yang Sect to demand justice. Qingle Palace probably won't be able to calm down for a while."

"Okay." Hua Xiangwan tapped the table. "I'll continue looking for the Blood Order. Call me if anything happens."

"Okay, then you and Changji be careful."

Yu Gu gave a few instructions and withdrew her divine sense from the kingfisher. The bird flapped its wings and flew away. Hua Xiangwan thought for a moment, then lowered her head and began writing a letter to Wen Rong, briefly describing what had happened at Goddess Mountain.

The gist was that after Wu Li's betrayal, she'd rescued Wen Shaoqing, who then conspired with her to murder Xie Changji, promising her the position of Demon Queen. However, Xie Changji refused to drink her wine. Shortly after, news arrived that Wen Shaoqing was pleading for help.

Finally, she added nonsensical statements about her absolute disbelief that Wen Shaoqing was dead and her determination to find him, expressing deep affection, before sending it to Wen Rong.

After finishing, she turned around to see Xie Changji had already made the bed and was sitting at the table brewing tea.

Hua Xiangwan, observing his actions, realized he hadn't meditated in a long time. She couldn't help asking curiously, "Why haven't you been meditating?"

"I saw someone brewing tea when I went downstairs." Xie Changji spoke calmly. "So I borrowed a set."

"What I mean is—" Hua Xiangwan stood up and sat opposite him. "You used to meditate and cultivate all the time. Why have you become increasingly lazy lately?"

"I am cultivating."

Xie Changji explained. Hua Xiangwan raised an eyebrow. "Cultivating what? Tea brewing?"

"Yes."

Xie Changji answered seriously, which piqued Hua Xiangwan's curiosity. "Why is your Heart-Questioning Sword cultivation method so strange?"

"Because the laws of all things are inherently based on all living beings." Xie Changji spoke slowly, the sound of flowing water filling the room. "Only by experiencing the world and human relationships can one understand the laws governing all things' operation in this world. In the past, I was too self-possessed. I talked about transcending the world before even entering it. How could I truly transcend?"

"So you're now in the world?" Hua Xiangwan rested her chin on her hand, tapping the table. "And then you'll leave it?"

She added, somewhat puzzled, "Then back then, weren't you already in the world?"

At this, Xie Changji paused.

The cruel ending kept replaying in his mind. He gripped the teacup handle. After a long while, he whispered, "I'm trapped in the world."

"So in the future, you'll always return to the realm of life and death, right?"

Hua Xiangwan asked casually.

The water on the small stove boiled. Xie Changji lowered his eyes.

Hua Xiangwan thought he wouldn't answer, but after a while, she heard him say, "I can't go back."

Hua Xiangwan was startled. The boiling water knocked off the teapot lid. Xie Changji calmly poured water, brewed tea, and pushed it toward her. "Try it."

Hua Xiangwan came to her senses, nodding thoughtfully.

Xie Changji took a sip of tea. "You didn't take the Dragon-Seeking Compass."

"Hmm." Hua Xiangwan replied casually, lost in thought. "He's dead. Whoever has the Dragon-Seeking Compass is the murderer."

"How do we find the Demon Lord's Blood Token after that?"

Hearing Xie Changji bring up serious matters, Hua Xiangwan perked up and immediately smiled. "Once we get a piece of the Demon Lord's Blood Token, it'll be much easier to find it."

"Oh?"

"The Blood Token is, after all, a whole. Even if it's broken into fragments, they'll still have a connection. Following the connection of the piece we have, we should be able to find it."

Xie Changji nodded without saying more.

The two sat in the room, quietly drinking tea.

Through the window, distant snow-capped mountains shone brightly in the moonlight. Hua Xiangwan then realized the room had been warm all along. The mountains outside seemed like a painting, not affecting the interior at all.

She looked for a long time, finally feeling a bit tired. She stretched, stood up, and walked into the room. "I'm going to sleep now."

Xie Changji nodded. Hua Xiangwan went in, lay down on the bed, hung the Azure Sea Pearl around her neck, tucked it inside her clothes, and closed her eyes.

This was a habit she'd maintained for many years. Whenever she had a premonition of nightmares, she'd take out this Azure Sea Pearl, which could calm her mind.

Xie Changji finished the tea outside, washed in the clean room, turned off the light, then returned to the bedside.

He didn't immediately get into bed. He sat silently beside her, gently stroking her long hair. Blue light flew into her brow.

Hua Xiangwan relaxed completely, seemingly falling into deep sleep. Seeing she was fast asleep, he pulled her hand to his face and made a cut on her wrist.

Blood flowed from Hua Xiangwan's wrist. He observed the amount carefully. After a moment, he pressed his hand against her wound, quickly wrote a spell, then made a cut on his own wrist, sealing the two wounds together.

His blood quickly entered Hua Xiangwan's body through the spell. After a while, feeling it was enough, he removed his hand, wiped each wrist with magical light. The wounds instantly disappeared, as if nothing had happened.

Then he quickly cleaned up everything stained with blood, restoring everything to normal, before returning to bed.

The blood loss made him a little tired, but it wasn't significant for him.

He held Hua Xiangwan as usual, channeling his spiritual energy into her body, and took her hand in his.

After holding her hand only a moment, he noticed that her hand, resting against her chest, seemed to be clutching something.

He'd never investigated before, but at that moment, as if possessed, he reached out and touched the object in her palm.

A smooth sphere, burning hot.

He recognized it almost instantly.

It was the Azure Sea Pearl.

The Azure Sea Pearl had a calming effect. She hadn't worn it before, but tonight she was.

He stared at her holding the pearl for a long time, tentatively reaching to take it away. After a moment's hesitation, he finally stopped.

He looked up at her face, seeing her calm expression. After hesitating, he thought for a moment, then lowered his head and kissed her forehead.

"Sweet dreams."

He said it softly, taking her hand in his, holding the Azure Sea Pearl with her, lying behind her, pulling her into his arms, and closing his eyes.

He felt the flow of her spiritual energy, the circulation of her blood, the beating of her heart.

He knew clearly that all of this was given by him.

Day after day, he would transfuse his blood to her. One day, he would rebuild her golden core, reconnect her meridians. Even the blood flowing in her veins would be his.

At that time, she could regain everything she'd lost—her search for love, her soul-locking lamp, everything.

Even if he died, her very bones and blood would be inextricably linked to him.

This thought filled his heart. He was like a tangled vine, wrapping around the back of her hand holding the Azure Sea Pearl, silently entangling her entire being.

---

Hua Xiangwan slept soundly through the night.

In her dream, she seemed to return to her youth, meeting Xie Changji for the second Qixi Festival. Shen Yichen came to see her. In the past, they always spent Qixi Festival together. Originally, she'd made plans with Xie Changji, but when she saw Yaoguang looking for him in the morning, she was somewhat unhappy.

She thought if he didn't take the initiative to speak, she wouldn't spend this Qixi Festival with him this year.

She waited all morning, but Xie Changji didn't speak. He seemed completely unaware of the festival and was supposed to be out exorcising evil spirits for the people.

Frustrated, she went out with Shen Yichen as usual.

Yunlai was bustling and vibrant. Shen Yichen led her, buying lanterns along the way. She played happily, forgetting her unhappiness.

After playing with Shen Yichen for a while, a girl suddenly exclaimed, "Ah, fireworks!"

She turned around with a smile. Fireworks exploded. Amidst the magnificent display and flickering lights, she saw a young man holding a lantern just like hers, standing quietly not far away.

He seemed out of place in this mundane world, serene and still as snow. In the instant their eyes met, she vaguely saw a hint of panic in his eyes.

However, he quickly composed himself, nodding at her as if merely passing by, then turned and left.

He carried the same beautiful lantern as hers and walked against the crowd. She tried to hold back, but couldn't help herself and shouted, "Hey, Xie Changji!"

The young man stopped. She tentatively asked, "Want to go shopping together?"

He had his back to her. After a long while, he spoke with difficulty. "No need. I have to go back to meditate."

With that, he walked away.

Hua Xiangwan watched his retreating figure and, for some reason, felt a pang of reluctance. She glanced back at Shen Yichen beside her and quickly said, "Yichen, I'll be going now. Please take my things back with me, thanks."

"Okay." Shen Yichen nodded, adding, "Come back soon."

Hua Xiangwan waved and caught up with the lone boy carrying a lantern ahead, slapping him on the shoulder. "Xie Changji."

Xie Changji turned around in surprise. Hua Xiangwan laughed. "You can meditate any day, right? Today is Qixi Festival. Come shopping with me."

"No need..."

"Come on." Hua Xiangwan grabbed him and wove through the crowd. "I just ate at a tangyuan place. It was so delicious—I'll take you there."

Xie Changji pursed his lips, following her through the crowd.

Upon arriving at the shop, she pulled him to sit down and called out to the owner, "Boss, a bowl of sesame filling, please."

"Oh." The owner smiled upon seeing Xie Changji. "Young master, I told you you should have a bowl. It's such a pity you haven't had one in so long."

Hearing this, Xie Changji blushed slightly for some reason. He got up to leave, but Hua Xiangwan grabbed him, quickly saying, "Why are you leaving? Eat one before you go."

Xie Changji was held back, unable to move forward or backward. After hesitating for a long time, he finally sat down.

The owner brought over the glutinous rice balls. Hua Xiangwan handed him a spoon, as if instructing a child. "Here, have you ever eaten before?"

Xie Changji nodded, lowering his eyes to quietly eat. Hua Xiangwan watched him, her chin propped on her hand.

He was handsome, usually possessing an aloof, ethereal air. But now, eating the rice balls, he finally seemed more human.

She watched quietly. Xie Changji didn't look up, quietly finishing the glutinous rice balls. She smiled. "Was it good?"

Xie Changji nodded, reminding her, "It's too late. Let's go back."

"There are still many more."

Hua Xiangwan paid, pulling him up. He stood stiffly, being dragged into the crowd by her.

"Xie Changji, I don't lack anything." She said casually, linking her arm with his. "The only thing I lack is someone to be with."

"You have many people to be with."

Xie Changji said indifferently.

"Not everyone can be seen when I turn around." Hua Xiangwan laughed. "I have everything, but I still hope that when I turn around, I'll see someone standing behind me."

Xie Changji turned to look at her. Hua Xiangwan's eyes held a hint of longing.

"That way, I'll know in my heart that I'm not walking alone in this world."

Xie Changji didn't speak. He calmly looked into her eyes.

The fireworks exploded again, his voice drowned out by the sound.

He said, "Mmm."

---

The dream was very ordinary. Hua Xiangwan was still somewhat dazed when she woke up.

So much time had passed that she didn't know if the dream was real or not, whether that last "Mmm" was real or something she'd added in her dream.

But she didn't delve into it. She turned to look around. Xie Changji was nowhere to be seen. Xiaobai was lazily sunbathing by the window.

She lay sprawled on the bed, feeling somewhat lost.

Guessing Xie Changji had gone to cook, she straightened up, took out the Demon Lord's Blood Token, and drew a locator array below it. The token quickly began to spin, stopping just as Xie Changji pushed open the door.

Looking at the direction it pointed, Hua Xiangwan was somewhat surprised. "No way..."

"Eat something."

Xie Changji knelt before the table, calling to her.

Hua Xiangwan didn't move, staring at the Demon Lord's Blood Token, frowning. "Impossible."

Just as she finished speaking, her chest suddenly trembled—the warning from the defensive talisman she'd left for Yun Qingxu.

"Oh no!" She hurriedly stood. "Yun Qingxu is in trouble!"

With that, she jumped out the window, called out "Xiaobai," and rushed away.

Xie Changji looked at the glutinous rice balls in front of him. After a moment, he picked them up, mounted his sword, and followed.

Hua Xiangwan turned around and saw Xie Changji still holding a bowl. She immediately knew his stubbornness was kicking in. Without saying a word, she reached out from behind her little white tiger. "Give me the bowl!"

Xie Changji shook his head. "You'll choke."

"I won't!"

Hua Xiangwan insisted, feeling it was undignified for Xie Changji to bring breakfast to a rescue. However, he didn't move. In a short while, the two rushed to the dense forest on the outskirts of the city.

A loud "boom" sounded. They saw Yun Qingxu being blasted away by a talisman.

Hua Xiangwan hurriedly pulled the white tiger to a stop. Before she could speak, a bowl of glutinous rice balls was placed in front of her.

Hua Xiangwan choked. Xie Changji looked at her calmly. "You eat first. I'll go rescue someone."

In that instant, Yun Qingxu was blasted away again and rolled on the ground.

Hua Xiangwan was anxious and quickly grabbed the glutinous rice balls, instructing Xie Changji, "Go!"

Xie Changji nodded and slowly moved forward. As the third magic circle crashed down on Yun Qingxu, he glanced back in the direction from which it came.

The light sword sped back in that direction. Hua Xiangwan heard Qin Yunshang exclaim in the distance, "It's Xie Changji! Run!"

As soon as she finished, Hua Xiangwan felt the person in the distance use up all their possessions and vanish in an instant.

She almost choked to death on the spot, unable to swallow a mouthful of glutinous rice ball.

That scoundrel Qin Yunshang—she ran way too fast.